Month: December 2009
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12/31/09 Midday Report: Let the New Year’s party begin (Except for the 10% of you unemployed)
2009 finally ends tonight and what a year it has been. The market sunk to a low of 666 before being exorcised by a low quality rally and a bottle of jesus juice, the US goverment bailed out the financial system and printed enough money to make Bill Gates seem like a pauper, unemployment spiked…
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12/30/09 Midday Report: The market mimics the Alabama school system as investors close their books until the New Year
With the year coming to a close, trading is thinner than a bulimic after a good gastric banding while market news is scarcer than Paris Hilton’s panties or Bernie Madoff’s investment returns. The only real market news out today is that the Chicago ISM was released and measured a whopping 60, though it is unclear…
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12/29/09 Midday Report: Consumers more confused than Alan Greenspan in a housing bubble
Data came out today showing a rise in consumer confidence for the second consecutive month, despite consumers rating their current situation as the worst since February 1983 (and to give you an idea about how long ago February 1983 was, Tennessee Williams was alive for most of the month, Case had yet to mix his…
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12/28/09 Midday Report: Light volume as the market tries to shed holiday pounds
The only real news today (other than that Nell Mcandrew is still hot) is that the extra day of shopping this year led to an increase in retail sales. Amazingly enough, analysts also found that an extra serving at dinner led to an increase in people gaining weight, an extra shot of Jager led to…
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12/24/09 Mid-Morning Report: It’s Christmas Eve, can a jew get a table dance?
Yes Money McBags lights the menorah and it looks like the market wants him to get those table dances tonight as it is up again on positively mixed news. Durable goods orders rose, though missed expectations with weakness in autos and airplanes which is not suurprising since “Cash for Clunkers” went away like Tom DeLay’s…
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12/23/09 Midday Report: Consumer confidence rises enough to spur consumers to still not buy new houses
Another day and more mixed data so Bulls and Bears can both rejoice (Yay!!! Things are getting better and Yay!! Things are staying crappy. See we can all get along, you hear that Israel and Palestine and Tiger and Elin?). US consumer confidence rose to 72.5 according to the Michigan Consumer Sentiment Index, though it…
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12/22/09 Midday Report: GDP revised down, existing home sales up (await downward revision)
The market got mixed news today as sales of existing homes grew 7.4% to a two year high of a 6.5MM annual rate (and we thank our lucky pornstars for tax breaks, 4% lower median home prices, foreclosure sales of houses formerly owned by the unemployed, and Faye Reagan) while GDP was revised downward from…
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12/21/09 Midday Report: The recovery is on, I read it on the internets
The market is rising today as people are becoming convinced that the economic recovery is real and not just the beginning of a double-dip recession (which is actually worse than double-dipping your chip at a party and not nearly as exciting as a good ATM double dip). Chicago Fed Chief Charles “Chuck E.” Evans maintains…
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12/18/09 Midday Report: Earnings surprises abound as RIMM jobs naysayers and naysayers begrudgingly admit they kind of liked it
The big news moving the market up today is that several tech companies beat earnings. Leading the way was RIMM who destroyed analyst forecasts of $1.04 by dropping $1.23 to their damp bottom line and growing topline by 49%. They also raised guidance, margin forecasts, and the ire of PALM who once again fell short…
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12/17/09 Midday Report: All the news sucks today, but will it swallow tomorrow?
A rash of negative news for the markets is out today. The dollar is rising thanks to the Fed saying they believe the economy is strengthening (they conveniently left out the part about the quadrillion dollars they printed over the past year to strengthen said economy, but I understand that is a minor detail) and…