Money McBags
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2/3/11 Midnight Report: Bernanke Says Everything is A-OK (Other than Employment, Non-Core Inflation, and Anything Else That Makes a Healthy Economy)
The market closed up again today as Ben Bernanke let the National Press Club know that either the economy is fucked, or it isn’t (Money McBags is still trying to decipher Benny B’s speech but as “blowhard” is what Money McBags’ considers a command and not a language, it may take some time), protests in…
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2/2/11 Midnight Report: Mubarak Challenges Quantitative Easing for Title of Biggest Pyramid Scheme
The market was relatively quiet today as protesters in Egypt clashed with pro-government supporters (apparently one group wore plaid and another wore stripes, how gauche), earnings were more mixed than a Barack Obama-John Kerry love child (and with a terrific radio voice to boot), and investors gathered around their TVs to see if Lloyd Blankfein…
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2/1/11 Midnight Report: Egypt Shmegypt. You Can’t Stop the Rally, You Can’t Even Hope to Contain It
Fuck yeah was it on today as the cry of “1400 or Bust!” rang through the trading pits (and if it is Melissa Archer’s bust, well, then Money McBags may have to be rooting with his shorts) like other momentous rallying cries such as “The British are coming,” “Remember the Alamo,” and “Who Let the…
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Small Company Update: KITD Rolls Up a Joint Acquisition
One of Money McBags’ favorite little companies, KITD, got their acquisition on again yesterday and bought a pu pu platter of video asset management technology companies in a flurry of transactions that surprised Money McBags more than protesters surprised the Egyptian government or this answer surprised the game show world (and Money McBags was surprised…
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1/30/11 Two Day After Report: Protests in Egypt Cause Market to Take It in The Sphinxter
Holy(land) shit did the market sell off on Friday as civil (or more exactly, uncivil) unrest overran the streets of Egypt like Ben Bernanke overran the Fed’s printing presses or hepatitis C overran Pam Anderson’s liver. Protesters were apparently frustrated by government corruption, economic stagnation, a lack of political freedom, and Ehsan Hatem El-Kirdany‘s refusal…
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Small Company Update: Surely You Can’t Like CRUS. Money McBags Does Like CRUS, and Don’t Call Him Shirley.
Money McBags did a quick analysis of CRUS yesterday and today he was able to go through their transcript and he has to say, he was actually pretty fucking surprised by how positive management sounded so perhaps there is still nice upside here. Below are Money McBags’ takeaways from the call. — 1. This company…
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1/27/11 Midnight Report: S&P Touches 1300, 1300 Says it Liked it
Despite new claims for unemployment putting up the largest weekly increase since September 2005 (and you all remember September 2005, right? Alan Greenspan was still a genius, iPads were still just the truncated spelling of a sanitary napkin, and Kim Kardashian’s vagina was still underwraps (and some guy named Damon Thomas too)), despite Japan being…
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1/26/11 Midnight Report: If a Fed Statement Falls During a Rally, Does it Make a Noise?
The market continued to rally today as the Fed voted to keep QE2 going (something about the economy being shitty, so rally on), bankers at Davos figuratively whipped out their cocks (which now seem so much smaller since they no longer get to mark to market) and pontificated about how regulation is bad for their…
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1/25/11 Midnight Report: Jury Duty Keeps Money McBags From Pinching Out A Column
Yep, that’s right, Money McBags had jury duty today and as a result, there will be no fucking column as he simply didn’t have time. — As for his foray in to the justice system, they tried to seat him on a 3 day lame ass civil trial but when he calmly explained to the…
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1/24/11 Midnight Report: Market Keeps Moving Higher as Investors Now Buy the Rip
Oh shit did the market get it’s buying on today as investors once again shunned the reality of Europe’s tenuous hold on the Euro (and Ireland, as the Fianna Fail party finally fucking failed this weekend. And note to political leaders, if you’re going to start a party, here are some words you might want…