Money McBags

  • 1/22/10 Day After Report: GE Causes Market to (Im)Melt Up as Shorts Watch their BACks

    A big fucking yawn today as less happened in US macro news than in an MBA strategy class (now let Money McBags get this straight Mr. Porter, which one of the five forces involves the ability to continuously print money to get out of debt?  Is that the “no threat of entry,” the “no substitute…

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  • 1/20/11 Midnight Report: When All Else Fails, Just Buy The Dip

    The market was down strong in the morning as both fears of rising inflation in China and common sense seemed to hurt sentiment, but then like a phoenix rising from the ashes (though luckily not River Phoenix rising from his ashes, because that would have been weird) investors stopped adjusting their bollinger bands, refused to…

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  • 1/19/10 Midnight Report: Market Goes Down on Earnings, Did it Swallow Idea that the Economy is Improving?

    The market sold off today as earnings were more mixed than Tiger Woods’ family tree, housing data continued to remind people that double dipping can cause more than just herpes, and investors were all liquidating their portfolios to get cash to buy those 50% off Amazon coupons at Living Social in order to get in…

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  • 1/18/11 Quick Update: Gone Fisting

    Money McBags will be back with a full column on Wednesday night, unfortunately he had shit to do today (and more unfortunately, this wasn’t what he had to do).  It’s a long sordid tale, but see, Money McBags has no income stream right now, and that is no way to live, unless you are a…

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  • 1/15/11 Day After Report: Investors Get Longer, Hope Earnings Won’t be a Stock Tease

    The market keeps rolling because retail sales missed expectations, ratings agencies threatened to lower the US’s pristine AAA credit rating, consumer sentiment dropped, and Hannah Hilton remains retired from porn.  Makes perfect sense, like trying to borrow money while saying you are about to go bankrupt or wearing a power balance bracelet (and yes, that…

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  • 1/13/11 Midnight Report: Once Again, New Claims for Unemployment Claim the Economy Still Sucks

    The market limped in to the close today as the dip buyers were somehow distracted by the jump in new claims for unemployment which were so far from analyst guesses that they were perhaps a Nassim Taleb-ian black swan (as opposed to a Natalie Portman-to-lesbian Black Swan), the continued rise of commodity prices (as companies…

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  • 1/12/11 Midnight Report: Quick Update for the Readers

    Money McBags isn’t going to be able to get to a full column today because other shit has come up (and it’s not just up because he found Olivia Munn’s new Maxim photo shoot).  Money McBags knows his column has been a bit sporadic since he hit his one year anniversary (and loyal readers know…

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  • 1/1/11 Midnight Report: Data Speaks Softly, Will Earnings Carry a Big Stick?

    It was a fairly quiet day on the market as investors get ready for earnings season, brace for an East Coast snow storm, and actively try to bet on which porn star Charlie Sheen will bang next (and for the record, Money McBags is taking Gracie Glam, in the kitchen, with his lead pipe).  That…

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  • 1/7/10 Day After Report: Take This Jobs Report and Shove It

    Oh shit was it on yesterday as macro news flew faster than Goldman subprime securitizations in 2005 or upward price target revisions on the S&P 500 in the last week (1,450, 1,500, does Money McBags hear 2850?  Sold to the witch doctor in the back). — The macro news included the B(L)S reporting their non-farm…

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  • 1/6/11 Midnight Report: Tweeting the Dip

    Money McBags is not going to have a full column tonight as he is burned the fuck out after the last three days of producing more material than Gabourey Sidibe‘s Oscar dress maker while scratching his head over all of the dip buying. — Instead of a column today, Money McBags hit the twitter and…

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