AMZN
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2/22/11 Midnight Report: Big Flaps in Mid East May Require Libyaplasty
Tim-fucking-berrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Holy shit is it on like Qadaffi’s dong as protesters in Libya whip themselves up in to a frenzy over the lack of Joanna Krupa’s latest Maxim spread being available to them (or over their oppressive treatment at the hands of Qadaffi, their lack of say in the government, their non-existent job opportunities, and…
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1/30/11 Two Day After Report: Protests in Egypt Cause Market to Take It in The Sphinxter
Holy(land) shit did the market sell off on Friday as civil (or more exactly, uncivil) unrest overran the streets of Egypt like Ben Bernanke overran the Fed’s printing presses or hepatitis C overran Pam Anderson’s liver. Protesters were apparently frustrated by government corruption, economic stagnation, a lack of political freedom, and Ehsan Hatem El-Kirdany‘s refusal…
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10/22/10 Midnight Report: Will Geithner’s plan at G20 hit the spot?
The market was mixed today as fears of currency wars formed the yin to earnings beats’ yang (or the teeth to earnings beats’ hummer if you will) and with macro data more non-existent than Mel Gibson’s career, there wasn’t much for the Street to manipulate. That said, a number of US officials were in the…
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7/23/10 Midafternoon Report: European banks pass stress test, results of colonoscopy still pending
The market was quiet in the morning despite a slew of solid earnings announcements as it waited for the release of the Europe bank stress tests which were more highly anticipated than Lindsay Lohan’s jail stint, Avatar’s opening weekend, or Mel Gibson’s next career limiting phone call. Well the results came out midday and were…
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4/23/10 Midday Report: Crash of the Titan as Greece requests bailout
The market is up today as sales of new homes were up 27% blowing past analyst guesses and rising by the most in five decades which is so long ago that baby boomers were still in grade school, man had yet to reach the moon, and full muff was still in style (like the very…
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1/29/10 Midday Report: Size doesn’t matter as 6% GDP expansion fails to stimulate the market
The market is bouncing around today even though GDP grew 5.7%, the fastest pace in 6 years and beat estimates of 4.7% growth. The upside was led by a restocking of inventories from their depressed levels (and inventories were more depressed than Kathy Griffin’s bikini waxer the time she ran out of rubber gloves). The…