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1/5/11 Midnight Report: Dip Bought
The market got its schwerve back on today by buying the dip as if the dip were going to cure cancer, reveal the meaning of life, and lead to a threesome with Kayla Collins and Sara Underwood (who as always, can get under Money McBags’ wood whenever she pleases). So forget about unemployment, forget about…
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8/11/10 Midevening Report: Market goes down furiously, swallows long positions
Timberrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. The market went down today faster than the Hummer Mom chaperoning a Boy Scout overnight. Given the months of bad macro data and the Fed warning about slower growth yesterday, the drop is about as surprising as learning that menstrual cramps may alter women’s brains (and for their next study, National Yang-Ming University will…
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3/4/10 Midafternoon Report: Market to Greece: “Your bonds are the one that I want,” just hope they don’t leave “Tears on My Pillow”
The market is bouncing around today as initial jobless claims were out and they fell by 29k to 469k, almost exactly the 470k number that economists estimated proving the old adage that “even a broken economist is almost right once a decade.” While the drop is positive, it didn’t drop by as much as claims…
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2/8/10 Midday Report: Debt crisis forces EU to pull Super Bowl ad, can only afford to broadcast it on new 24 hour Michael Bolton Hip Hop Channel
The market opened down again before bouncing back a bit as people are more worried about Europe’s debt problems than they are about global warming, health care spending, and that thing on Drew Brees’ face. The President of the EU’s Central Bank, Jean Claude Trichet (and it must be pointed out that his name is…