Greece
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3/11/10 Midday Report: Yield curve spread continues to fatten, claims it wants to star in Precious sequel
The market is holding steady today as foreclosures in the US rose at their slowest pace in four years. While slowing rates of foreclosures are sort of pyrrhic news similar to declining new cases of AIDS or slumping sales of country music cds, a slower rate means a slower rising homeless population and that can’t
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3/10/10 Midafternoon Report: Is that a bank rally in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
The market is higher today on the strength of a banking sector rally, positive economic news from China, and a likely date tonight with Izabel Goulart (because why else would it be this excited?). The macro news today has been slightly positive with wholesale inventories down only .2% sequentially in January after being down 1%
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3/9/10 Midafternoon Report: Happy birthday bear market low, now go fuck yourself
Today marks the one year anniversary of the bear market’s devilish low of 666. To celebrate the nearly 70% rise since then, unemployed workers throughout the country are taking a day off from job hunting to resole their well worn and tattered shoes while Wall Street bankers are wiping their delicate behinds with their beluga
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3/5/10 Midafternoon Report: With Oscars approaching, the market is “Up” as economists “Blind Side”d by fewer job losses while strength of recovery remains “Up in the Air”
The market is running again as a result of the jobs report and inertia. According to the (No)Labor Department, the economy lost 36k jobs in February while the unemployment rate stayed steady (and for those cunning linuists or Nabokov fans, that is back to back anagrams) at 9.7%. This was better than the estimates of
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3/4/10 Midafternoon Report: Market to Greece: “Your bonds are the one that I want,” just hope they don’t leave “Tears on My Pillow”
The market is bouncing around today as initial jobless claims were out and they fell by 29k to 469k, almost exactly the 470k number that economists estimated proving the old adage that “even a broken economist is almost right once a decade.” While the drop is positive, it didn’t drop by as much as claims
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3/3/10 Midday Report: Service sector expands thus providing most valuable service: A rising market
The market is up again as the service industry grew more than forecast last month thanks to more people stopping off at McDonalds on their way to the unemployment office and then washing their sorrows away by watching touching interpretative dances at their local Rick’s Cabaret in order to warm the cockles of their jobless
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2/25/10 Midfternoon Report: Goldman Sachs seeks nobel prize for literature after (under)writing biggest Greek tragedy since Euripides
Greece’s debt issues are once again scaring the market like the snake ridden visage of the famous gorgon from ancient Greek mythology known more familiarly as Lady GaGa. Rising debt, a spiraling deficit, and a massive bidding up of CDS by traders betting against Greece has created somewhat of a Foucault current around the Greek
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2/22/10 Midday Report: M&A picking up as small companies take out their diaphrams hoping to trap acquirers before rates increase
The market is running in place today as it awaits further earnings and macro news later this week. The big M&A news today is that Schlumberger is buying Smith International for $11B, while the big T&A news today is that Rhian Sugden is hot. Schlumberger, which sounds like what is served for lunch in Berlin
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2/12/2010 Pre-Market Report: China tired of Greece stealing headlines, raises reserve rate to try to be January’s Economist centerfold, promises to show their Shanghai if selected
It’s a travel day for Money McBags so we’ll get to the market news early. The big story which should give pause to the market (and by pause, I mean send it into a bit of a downward hissy fit like someone at Fox News after trying to spell USA without a teleprompter) is that
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2/11/10 Midday Report: EU says they will bail Greek out but offers few details, claims they were drunk at the time
The Greek debt crisis in Europe is still causing uncertainty in the markets as the leaders of the EU gave a tepid, vague, and Spicoli-ian response to their discussions and plans to bailout the Greeks. The president of the EU, some guy named Jose Barroso who also doubles as the Prime Minister of some place