Greece
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2/10/10 Midday Report: Bernanke’s statement stuns meteorologists, causes it to rain on market’s parade in the middle of a snowstorm
The big news moving the market down today was the statement from Ben Bernanke about the FED’s future policy plans. Bernanke was supposed to testify in front of the House Financial Services Committee but the snow storm in Washington caused the hearing to be postponed giving Barney Frank more time to make snow angels and
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2/9/10 Midday Report: Greece once again open for business, no longer a Euro school dropout
The market is up strongly this morning after EU Bank president Jean-Claude Trichet decided to leave Australia where he was attending the Reserve Bank of Australia’s 50th Anniversary Symposium which was a party likely as raucous as a staring contest between Bea Arthur and JD Salinger (mainly because they’re both dead). Even so, we are
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2/8/10 Midday Report: Debt crisis forces EU to pull Super Bowl ad, can only afford to broadcast it on new 24 hour Michael Bolton Hip Hop Channel
The market opened down again before bouncing back a bit as people are more worried about Europe’s debt problems than they are about global warming, health care spending, and that thing on Drew Brees’ face. The President of the EU’s Central Bank, Jean Claude Trichet (and it must be pointed out that his name is
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2/5/2010 Midday Report: Unemployment rate drops as more jobs are lost, for next trick, unemployment rate to solve world peace by creating more wars
The market is down again today as Europe’s sovereign debt problem keeps rearing it’s ugly head like Mayim Bialik on the ABC Family network. The big news in the US markets is that the unemployment rate fell to a measly 9.7% (though if you include people who stopped looking for work and those working part
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2/4/10 Midday Report: Market shows Paris Hilton isn’t the only thing that can go down
Tim-motherfucking-ber. The market is nosediving today like a Biggest Loser contestant going after the last gravy covered deep fried twinkie at an all you can eat “stuff that’s bad” for you bar (and no offense to you weight-challenged people out there, but did you really need to go on a TV show to figure out
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2/3/10 Midafternoon Report: Market seeking direction like troubled teen in ABC afterschool special, though with less crying and less Meredith Baxter Birney
The market is mostly lower today despite some moderately postive macro reports (moderately positive in the way that learning you have syphilis is moderately more positive than learning you have nut cancer). The ISM said the service industry expanded in January for the first time in three months, which may be one reason RICK is
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1/28/10 Midday Report: Global economy still more fragile than faberge egg wrapped in Donald Trump’s ego
The market is down again today thanks to Qualcomm giving a subdued forecast and something again about people not having jobs. Luckily, according to the Fed, the recession may be over which has left many of the 10% of unemployed people loudly cheering from their urine stained cardboard boxes. The Fed upgraded its economic outlook, reaffirmed
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1/27/10 Midday Report: In bid to increase approval ratings, Obama to unveil Apple Tablet at State of the Union address as a panacea for US budget problems
The market continues to limp it’s way down as investors await tonight’s State of the Union address where President Obama is likely to whip out his small business tax breaks and smack them against a non-defense discretionary spending budget freeze. This budget freeze supposedly applies to 17% of the Federal budget and will have enough
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12/17/09 Midday Report: All the news sucks today, but will it swallow tomorrow?
A rash of negative news for the markets is out today. The dollar is rising thanks to the Fed saying they believe the economy is strengthening (they conveniently left out the part about the quadrillion dollars they printed over the past year to strengthen said economy, but I understand that is a minor detail) and
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12/15/09 Midday Report: Porter trims forces to 4 as commodities laugh at competitive advantages
The big news today is that wholesale inflation is up 1.8% and manufacturing in the US is churning out more goods people can’t afford to buy, especially if prices have to be raised now that input costs/commodities are moving up faster than expectations (weird that expectations were wrong, though much less weird than the new