manufacturing
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8/2/10 Midevening Report: Market hits ten week high as meth lab in the basement finally pays off
The market ran faster today than Roman Polanski going to get his keys to pick the baby sitter up because the manufacturing sector grew at its slowest pace since December, private construction spend dipped for the second month in a row, and Ben Bernanke said shit still sucks out there. So rally fucking on like…
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6/16/10 Midday Report: BP sets aside $20B to be used on an oily day
First of all, Money McBags would like to thank all of you for your feedback yesterday. His inbox is currently overflowing like Whitezilla’s urethra after downing three cases of Mountain Dew in ten minutes (and feel free to google “Whitezilla” on your own time, Money McBags refuses to link to it due to good taste)…
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6/1/10 Midafternoon Report: Market adopts new tagline “Sell the rumor, sell the news”
Stocks bounced around today like BP’s excuses for the Gulf oil spill or like Kelly Brook’s “oil domes” while she jumps on a trampoline. Solid US economic data pushed the market in to positive territory in the morning, giving investors a slight glimmer of hope before that hope was flushed away like a 3 story…
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5/3/10 Midafternoon Report: Consumer spending up as sales of moral hazard increase (though to be fair it does come in blue this season)
Stocks are off to the races again today and the good news is that the market is seemingly being ridden by Calvin Borel. Sending the market up is that Greece is once again set to be bailed out, Warren Buffet was out defending Goldman Sachs, and people are spending more than they earn. Hold on…
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4/15/10 Midday Report: Tax day causes 53% of the US population to be pissed, other 47% pissed every day about being broke
Oh shit, just when the economy was looking better than a threesome with Hayley Atwell and Alice Eve, new jobless claims for last week rose for the second week in a row and economists didn’t have Easter to blame this time. Well, actually they did, as a government analyst once again warned that the numbers…
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3/1/10 Midevening Report: Semis conduct market higher, next up, Beethoven’s Fifth
Wow. The market ripped up today like it was competing for the Ansari X Prize in 2004 or like it was rushing to claim the last seat in a dream Hayley Atwell–Kate Bosworth Ultimate Surrender match (nsfw, unless your work doesn’t suck). Technology led the way thanks to an upbeat report on chip sales and…
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2/18/10 Midevening Report : Bernanke preemptively raises discount rate, causes Alan Greenspan to roll over in his grave
Aw shit, it is now on like donkey kong as the Fed is getting serious about some shit. This ain’t your Greenspan pushover, lolligagging, lobster tails and blow jobs for everyone, bubble creating Federal Reserve. No siree, this Bernanke guy is a straight up pimp and will bitch slap the market back to reality and…
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2/17/10 Midevening Report: Fed hints at reversing stimulus, starts by canceling Bernanke’s Playboy subscription
The market was up today like a hooker’s skirt in Tiger Wood’s SUV. The rally was driven by earnings, earnings, earnings and some macro data. Apparently people are still building houses as housing starts hit their 6-month high, rising 2.8% to an annual rate of 591k. This marginally beat expectations and should be a good…
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1/21/10 Midday Report: With healthcare solved, Obama to take on banking industry
The big news spooking the market today is Obama’s unknown plan to try to regulate banks. He is now said to be giving former Fed Chairman Paul Volcker the keys to palace and Volcker is rumored to be getting all Glass-Steagall on bankers’s asses telling them they can’t trade financial securities using their own deposits. …
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1/4/10 Midday Report: It’s 2010, yet the market is partying like it’s 1999
Hide the women and children because the market is coming back with a vengeance, like Dirty Harry Callahan or Don Knotts on Three’s Company. The market appears to be determined to show all of the traders who manufactured complex derivitaves such MBS, ABS, and plain BS, that financial engineering can only keep it down for…