Greece
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4/14/11 Midnight Report: As Always, New Claims For Unemployment Claim the Economy Still Sucks
The market rallied a bit in the afternoon as rising new claims for unemployment missed analyst guesses by somewhere near a fuckton (give or take an asshair or ten), Portugal and Greece saw bond yields rocket up more than applications to LaSalle’s MBA program and even more than Kate Upton on the awesomeness scale, and
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12/16/10 Midnight Report: Market Reaches Two Year High, Will Data Hold an Intervention?
The market was up today as PIMCO is set to get their equity on, Fed Ex plans to deliver a fuckload of packages in the next year (even more packages than Victoria Givens took for delivery in 2004, and like all proper businesses, she required they all be delivered in the rear), and former Obama
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12/15/10 Midnight Report: Rich Guys Vote To Extend Tax Cuts For Rich, Laughter Trickles Down to Middle Class
The market continued to move sideways today as economic data was less relevant than Bernie Madoff’s thoughts on the CAPM and fund managers don’t want to rock the boat (though they’ll happily tickle the little man inside of it) this close to year end bonuses. This lack of volatility in the market is less surprising
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11/23/10 Midnight Report: Fed Minutes Show Only Hours Until Dollars’ Demise as the Economy Will Be The Real Turkey This Thanksgiving
The market is limping in to Thanksgiving like Kenny Easterday with a broken wrist thanks to the European Union being on shakier ground than Gabourey Sidibe on a tight rope, North Korea dropping bombs on South Korea after South Korea’s TSA apparently tried to touch Kim Jong-ils junk, and the Fed releasing the minutes from
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10/12/10 Midnight Report: Fed minutes count down the seconds to QE2
It was another quiet day in the market as the expectation of QE2 continues to dominate the headlines like Securities Analysis dominates the insomnia drug market or like Gabourey Sidibe dominates a doughnut (or box of doughnuts to be more precise). The market still can’t figure out what to do as investors continue to oscillate
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10/7/10 Midnight Report: Market flat enough to be part of the itty bitty returns committee
The market closed moderately down today as investors, gamblers, and algorithms everywhere await tomorrow’s jobs report which will likely be as telling as one of Eddie Long’s altar boys (well for the ten or so years prior to this one) because thanks to the delightful birth/death model (where the output is more hard-coded than the
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8/20/10 Midevening Report: Market keeps going down, investors worry it may develop lockjaw
The market continued to stumble today as if it were Heather Mills on an inclined treadmill. With a dearth of macro news, the sell off was still a result of yesterday’s craptacular economic data where new claims for unemployment jumped, productivity in Philly shrank, and as always, Hannah Hilton remained retired (and please Hannah, come
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8/5/10 Midevening Report: New claims for unemployment continue to claim the economy still sucks
The market traded down today like anyone who has ever broken up with the delightful Brooklyn Decker as new claims for unemployment were out and were much worse than analysts had guessed (and not just because analysts suck at their jobs like one-legged kick boxers, but because we’re in a fucking recession). Money McBags hates
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7/8/10 Midday Report: More bulls hit
The market jolted up on unemployment news this morning before remembering it had already gone up yesterday and thus quickly settled in like an environmentally friendly squatter in Al Gore’s mansion. The big macro news is that new claims for unemployment dropped to 454k or some number higher than that depending on how much the
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6/24/10 Midnight Report: Market dials up LifeCall as it has fallen and can’t get up
The market tanked at the end of the session like Money McBags’ day which has caused today’s column to be late, short, and in need of one more read through, but it is what it is. You see, Money McBags was cranking away at his terminal, busily breaking down the news, perusing 10Ks for cheap