Just a quick daily report because Money McBags spent way too much time breaking down DFZ’s Q earlier today, especially considering no one gives a fuck about the company including investors, the CEO, and probably even the CEO’s mom (though Money McBags’ analysis kills it).  That said, the market was up modestly today on light volume and lighter news, unless you consider some dink named Austan Goolsbee* being appointed as Obama’s Chairman of Economic Advisors as news (and Goolsbee can now no doubt closely advise the President on where all the “ghouls be” in the economy, and yes Money McBags had to do make that joke).  Anyway, since we’re already here, Goolsbee is the youngest chairman since Arthur Okun in 1969 which is fitting because the economy is testing whether Okun’s Law was actually too conservative.

In macro news, wholesale inventories were up 1.3% which was their largest jump in two years and signals a continued inventory build, but as a witch doctor (or economist, take your pick) said in the linked to article: “Either the economy picks up or production has to be cut.”  Wow, thanks Captain Obvious, care to let Money McBags know your take on the still unsolved P-NP problem?  Let me guess, either P=NP or it doesn’t (and as Money McBags eloquently proved weeks ago, unless N=1 then P does not = NP.   Hardest problem in the world solved, now where’s Money McBags’ prize?).  Anyway, as usual the data can be interpreted however one feels like interpreting it since macroeconomics is less of a science than alchemy or muff guessing, but Money McBags is going to interpret it both as the underlying trend indicates (which is badly) and in sign language (which Money McBags believes would look like this).

Internationally, nothing really happened about which anyone should give a shit (unless you hate the rest of the world and in that case give all the shit you want).  Germany’s Deutsche Bank is looking to raise $11.5B to help prepare them for possible new BASEL capital requirements but the offering has not yet been completed thus leaving Deutsche’s bag empty.  Also, Finland’s Nokia hired some Canadian from MSFT to run their mobile phone business and based on MSFT’s success in the mobile phone software market, this should be a slam dunk hiring (and yes that was sarcasm).  On the bright side, the guy they hired, Stephen Elop (whose name is an anagram of “pestle phone” though hopefully he won’t ground Nokia’s phone business into dust) who at one point was the Chief Information Officer of Boston Chicken so perhaps he can get all employees in to the VIP club for free.

In stock news LULU stretched their way to a huge quarter, more than doubling their profit from last year and became one of the few companies to raise guidance as unemployed people buy more yoga mats to serve as roofs for their cardboard box houses and as they devote more time to meditating their stresses away.  Semiconductors couldn’t flip their losing switch today as NSM’s weak guidance and TI’s narrowed revenue guidance led investors to realize once again that the end market is going to be softer than Jessica Simpson’s end market (and far less delectable).  Falling semi-conductor stock prices are trying to disprove Moore’s law that smaller is better.

In small cap news, light volume kept companies relatively in check with little news today.  That said, take some time read Money McBags’ detailed, exhaustive, and at times heart wrenching break down of DFZ while you enjoy your weekend.

*Money McBags had a great joke involving “Austin Goolsbee” being an anagram of “Outgoes Lesbian” as this is the person he is replacing, but then Money McBags realized that “Austin” is spelled “Austan” which obviously killed the anagram, so a big fuck you to Mr. and Mrs. Goolsbee for ruining one of the potentially greatest political economics jokes ever (which is admittedly a low bar).

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