Ladies, Gentlemen, Dick Fisher,

It is a sad fucking day here in the offices of the award winning When Genius Prevailed, and not just because Japan is melting down worse than Bill O’Reilly trying to read a teleprompter, not just because Qaddafi is attacking his own people (and showing he has more lives than Rick Salomon’s schlong), and not just because Money McBags could not find any SFW pics of Erica and Rachelle Drummond (so you are stuck with the NSFW ones).  No, it is a sad day because Money McBags is in the middle of a fucking fire drill (and unfortunately it doesn’t involve waiting in line to get tickets to Charlie Sheen’s live show and it is way more severe than a simple fire bush) and thus he was unable to get to the markets today.  And it is not just today, but Money McBags is going to be a bit out of touch until early next week, though he hopes to have a full column tomorrow (that is if there is still a functioning market as while Money McBags types this, Japan is rushing to the bottom faster than Kim Kardashian‘s latest manfriend or Alan Greenspan on a list of “greatest people named Alan.”).

Money McBags will try to check in briefly after tomorrow, and he will be updating on the twitter and the facebook, but for the most part there will be radio silence here until early to mid-next week (though Money McBags hears the radio will be playing Lady Gaga, so it is good there will be silence).  Anyway, sorry for the time off (trust Money McBags, he will be having less fun than Stevie Wonder’s seeing eye dog at a urinal), but you can always reach Money McBags with your thoughts at, and as loyal readers know, he answers any email that doesn’t include a cockshot (so ~25% of them).  But don’t despair because Money McBags does have ~16 months of archives, and surely you have missed a day or 200, so feel free to scroll through past columns if you need your daily dick joke fix.

To the pain,

Money McBags

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